Madame Maya's Drabbles
by Madame Maya
Summary: Just a bunch of Saiyuki drabbles I've written. Seven up, so far. Mild shonenai and or yaoi, usually. There's yaoi, suggested and not so suggested, in a few. Will post more as I write them.
1. Chapter 1

"Is He Drunk or Not!"

By Madame Maya

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Yay! I can drabble! LOL! You know the drill: Read and review!

Drabble One hundred words on the dot. No more, no less.

Words in my drabble: 100 on the dot! ...Damn, it's HARD, lol!

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Kenren was drunk. Again.

'This is getting old,' though Konzen, who had been vouchsafed the sight of the drunken general stumbling into his office and bellowing an 'I love ya, man!' before passing out on the floor. Great. Now he had six feet of god to contend with.

He finally shrugged and went back to his paperwork. 'Maybe he'll pass off as a rug.'

Stamp the paper, flip the paper.

Stamp the paper, flip the paper.

Stamp the paper, jerk back in shocked fury and punch Kenren in the gut.

"WHY THE HELL DID YOU KISS ME!"

Kenren just laughed.

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Well? Lol!


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Gambling pays. 

Rating: G. So unlike me…

Words: 102. (Fuck. Lol.)

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"What do you MEAN you don't take credit cards!" Sanzo demanded.

The girl replied nervously, "Um, I'm really sorry, but we don't have a scanner yet…"

Sanzo saw red- literally- as Gojyo nudged in front of him and winked at the desk girl.

"Ignore him, he hasn't had his meds yet," he grinned, digging into his pocket. "This enough?"

The girl accepted the bills with a smile. "Yes, here are your keys." Gojyo thanked her, then turned to the others with a smirk.

"Anything to say about my gambling habits NOW, Sanzo-sama?"

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(Laughs) When plot bunnies attack, ya gotta feed 'em! What say? I wrote and edited it in all of five minutes, so there's probably something stupid about it, lol... (Expectant lookWell?


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Uh, those AREN'T balloons… 

Rating: Hmm… Pg-13 for suggestion?

Words: 109 (Shimatte…)

Notes: If you read it right, you can smell a bit of extremely suggestive Kenren/Tenpou in there. Dedicated to Cupnjava, because it's RAHO's damn fault I thought of condoms and balloons in the first place!

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Kenren gaped at the sight before him; Goku, sitting on the floor of his office, said office being decorated by beige balloons. No, wait, those weren't balloons…

'Aw, fuck,' Kenren cringed mentally. Goku beamed up him.

"Hi, Ken-nii-chan! Look, I decorated your room for ya! I found a whole BUNCH of these balloons in Ten-chans' desk! He said they're yours. Ne, why were they in his desk, if they're yours? He looked funny when he said it, too… Yeah, like that! He looked just like that!"

'That's an interesting shade of red,' Konzen noted from the doorway, hiding a smirk. 'I wonder how he's going to explain this one…'

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…Sheepish grin Sorry. Hyper for some reason, heh… How is it?


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Truth or Dare 

Rating: PG - PG-13 for shonen-ai.

Words: 105 (Damn it, lol.)

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Hakkai got up with a resigned look on his face, then took Goku's face gently in his hands and pressed an even gentler kiss to the blushing boys' face.

Gojyo grinned, watching his two friends kiss. 'SO not gonna let them hear the end of it. NEVER.'

Hakkai finally released a quite giddy Goku and sat back down, then pointed an accusing finger at Gojyo, blushing madly. "I am NEVER playing truth or dare with you three ever again."

"Not my fault the monkey's got a crush on you."

"'M not a monkey…"

"Whatever. And no more favors, either."

"Nope. 'M good."

Hakkai blushed harder.

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(Hides) Lol. What do you think?

Also: Thanks for the great reviews so far, guys! I've got five reviewers, it seems; thanks to Blood-Debt, Shooting Starlight31, space-cadet6, SanzoxGoku Lover, and Cid the Stampede!


	5. Chapter 5

Title: A (Good Kind of) Heavenly Quarrel.  
Rating: Er-herm. Let's say R for completely OBLIVIOUS suggestion, lol.  
Word Count: Double drabble; it wouldn't fit in a single, lol. 197.  
Notes: It's official; I'm beyond hope. Total CRACK! 

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Gojun and Konzen were fighting, and all of Heaven knew it. Despite the aforementioned Gods' best efforts, all of Heaven also knew what they were fighting ABOUT. No wonder, from the amount of sheer NOISE that came from Konzen's office during them.

CRASH. "Oi! I just got that fixed from last time, you idiot!"

THUD. "Don't call me an idiot, Douji! And you're the one that pushed me in the first place!"

A string of cursing. "Ah! Not so rough, baka!"

A smug sounding chuckle. "Oh, you love it. Now shut up and sit down."

"…Fine. …Damn it, not on the papers! You can't read them now!

"Oh, shut up. It' completely your fault, anyway."

"Hmph." An moan was heard then, passed off later as a moan of pain. Like anyone believed that…

Only Gojun and Konzen would argue when they're screwing… And the aforementioned paperwork had to be recopied. Apparently, it was smeared beyond recognition after the fight. A few odd shaped creases, as well. One of which looked remarkably like a kamis' butt print.

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…(Sheepish grin) Review, if you don't mind, lol.


	6. Chapter 6

Title: Poor Hakkai… 

Author: Me, lol, MadameMaya!

Rating: Eh, closer to PG than PG-13.

Warning(s): Just a bit of Hakkai torture and innuendo, lol!

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Gojyo couldn't stop grinning. Couldn't help it, he was grinning his ASS off.

Why? Well, probably had something to do with the waitress flirting with Hakkai. No, flirting is the wrong word. She was trying her DAMNEDEST to get into his pants, and Hakkai couldn't stop blushing. Poor guy.

"Can I get you some CREAM for your coffee, Master Cho?" She purred, pressing her rather large bust into his back. And damn if she wasn't staring right between his legs!

"I! Uh… I'm fine?" Poor guy. Stuttering his head off. He didn't know WHAT to do!

And damn if the monkey didn't look homicidal…

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…(Grinning madly) I can so see this happening, I'm sorry, lol… By the way? The waitress is the one we see in episode five. …(Grin) Brownies for who can tell me her name.


	7. Chapter 7

Title: "Dirty Dancing"  
Word count: 203 (Double Drabble)  
Rating: PG-13 for a rather Perverted!Gojun  
Pairing: Gojun and his wife.  
Warnings: Gojun has a one track mind, lol.  
Notes: Set just after Kenren arrived. I got hit over the head with it just before two AM. Head desk  
Summary: Because all dragons need to learn how to dance some way or another.

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"Alright, now put your hand on my hip, like so," the female dragon instructed, taking the hand in question and positioning it on her hip.

Gojunblinked, "Just a moment, are we dancing or copulating?"

Emberlin barely held back a snicker, "We are dancing, of course. Why?"

"Because if you place my hand any lower, we will most likely not leave the room anytime soon."

The queen smirked, "Perhaps I should be teaching General Kenren how to dance, then? I daresay he would doubtlessly have no qualms concerning his hand on my hip…"

Red eyes narrowed. Now that was just dirty pool.

He put his hand on her hip.

"That's a bit low for dancing in public, dear…"

"Not my fault."

"Hmph. It never is, apparently…"

"Of course not; I'm not the one that made you look like you do. How does one expect me to behave when you move like you are? Particularly when you are wearing that… whatever it is you call that thing."

"It's aleotard, you prat. It makes it easier to move. Speaking of moving, we need to be dancing, not chatting."

"Makes a good many things easier, really…"

"Pervert."

"Still not my fault."

"Of course not…"

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(Sheepishly shrugs) What? He had to learn somehow, lol…


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